Sunday, December 2, 2012

Awkward

Sometimes the word awkward seems to just sum up my life here in Spain. Because being an exchange student means my life is just full of embarrassing, and hilarious moments, and It's become inevitable. I've learned that the best way to handle it all is to just embrace it.

That awkward moment when...

you fall down the stairs on your third day of school, in front of everyone.

the Spaniards here know more about America then you do.

everyone thinks your life is straight out of high school musical. wait, it is.

you realize spanish food is not mexican food, and no one here knows what a quesadilla is.

you walk in a strike, chanting and such, with absolutely no clue what they are actually protesting.

if you don't work hard in gym... you're weird. i feel like I'm training for the olympics in gym class.

your english teacher is wrong.

I help the kid next to me with english homework, and he teaches me bad words in Spanish.

the coolest app in spain right now is a piece of poop that eats, sleeps, and dies. 

you think dog shampoo... is human shampoo. and you use it. 

But at the same time, there have been extremely rewarding moments, that help me stay sane after a few million awkward ones.

like as the holiday season is beginning, I'm starting to realize that it isn't the actual holidays that I always loved so much. It was the company of friends and family that always made it so special.

For example, I sat at the table for lunch on thanksgiving, eating my food sadly. You know like stabbing your food and then biting it really loudly, I was definitely making a scene. And after an extremely regular Thursday at school, I was almost over the edge. And to make it even worse, I had english class that day. My teacher, Ana, was explaining the importance of Thanksgiving. That to me, It is more than a time to get together and eat, It's a holiday centered around family, and how being away from mine on a day like this must be especially difficult. Well, as I was dramatically eating my peas, my sister turns to my mom and goes "Megg is really sad today, because she won't be able to spend Thanksgiving at home with her family." In that moment, the tears start to fall. My sisters hug me, and my mom holds my hand. She promises me that she will find a turkey somewhere in Valladolid, and we will celebrate the way I normally do. I completely appreciated that, and it sounded perfect, until a minute later when I realized I couldn't remember any of the foods that we normally eat at Thanksgiving, and I definitely didn't know how to cook a turkey. It wasn't about recreating the traditions though, or even about eating a turkey. It was about family. Spending one day, one meal with the people you love, and just reflecting on all of the things in your life you have to be thankful for. 

Or the moment when I realized that there is more to life than America. I love America, and I am so proud to be from such a great country. But a lot of times we forget about the world around us. Yes, English is known worldwide, but that doesn't mean we can't learn a few extra languages. I was so surprised when I first arrived in Spain. They know all the words to all the popular American songs, and even all the famous actors in all the American movies. Also, when someone notices I'm from America, more times than not, they come up to me and introduce themselves, sometimes even in English. When I first got here, I didn't know any Spanish songs, nor any Spanish movies. And in America, if I hear someone speaking another language, it almost gives me more reason not to go up to them. And people here know whats going on in America. They are aware of the world, something I can say that I was not when I arrived. I didn't even watch the news. Now when I hear that something is happening in this or that part of the world, it has more significance to me. I might know someone who lives there, and overall I have a care for the world that three months ago did not exist. There is more to the world than America, so much more. 

Then there was the day when a friend said "Sometimes I forget I'm talking to an American, I just think of you as another Spaniard." Probably the compliment of the century. I know she was exaggerating, obviously I am not a Spaniard, nor will I ever be one. But to know that I am getting closer and closer everyday, closer to my final goal of speaking fluently, or to know that people are noticing that I actually am learning, I feel accomplished. It makes the sacrifices I made, worth it. More than worth it, it makes them disappear. Because I can tell you that I want to be fluent in Spanish way more than I want to be home. It's hard to track your language skills, because it isn't like you take a test every night before you go to bed. It's just a process, and the little compliments let's me know I'm on the right track! 

I am thankful for the awkward moments, along with the fulfilling moments. Getting through the uncomfortable times have led me to the rewarding ones, and they've helped me grow along the way. I'm thankful for the people that have helped me through the past three months, and the people that have helped me for the past sixteen years. I'm thankful for the country I'm from, and the new country that I've grown to love. More than anything I'm thankful to be where I am, and thankful for the place and people I will come home to in seven months.

Feliz Dia de Accion de Gracias!
Happy Thanksgiving Y'all (sorry it's a little late!)




1 comment:

  1. That part at the beginning seriously made me laugh so hard. "...a little piece of poop that eats, sleeps, and dies." But it was funny because it is true... :)

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