The Up's and Down's

On Friday my English teacher asked the class, "what is your greatest dream in life?" Of course she called on me, as I was the only native speaker in the classroom. The answer rolled off my tongue, "I'm living it."

I know I left things a little negatively with my last post, and If you are considering studying abroad, or currently applying, I want to set things straight. First of all, we have so much in common. I am sure that you are beyond excited about everything right now, as you should be. I hope if you're reading my blog that you're able to relate. A lot of other AFS blogs try to stay pretty positive, and while I want to tell you about all the great things, I hope you also understand that the not so great things are just as vital as I continue to grow throughout my exchange year. I live by the fact that with the up's there will be down's, and with every down there will be an up.

Honestly, I came into this year thinking I was going to be a special case, I was never going to experience the roller coaster of emotions, never be homesick, and never be sad. I have officially been away from home for three weeks, the longest I have ever been away. Just these three weeks have been hectic. School is hard. period. After the first day though, everything get's better. Everything always gets better. I know that as I was beginning to apply I read everyones blogs, and everything that was said I took into consideration, knowing that eventually it would be me. I want you to know that no matter how negative one blog post is, I will never regret my decision. And never have I regretted this decision, not for one second.

This week was hard, but then again with every down though there are too many ups to count. 

First, I had a great weekend. On Friday I went out with some of my new friends from school. (yes, I made friends.) It was a group of about ten of us, and we went to a bar and hung out for a few hours. On Saturday I went shopping with two other AFSers in Ponfe (thats our nickname for Ponferrada), Lani and Shannon, and then their sisters. After trying half of Zara on, we went to a Pizza place in the center of town, and met Derin and Emils (other AFS Ponfe kids). I love my Ponfe chapter, when we are together it is so much fun! AFS discourages a lot of contact with the other kids in the program, but because we all weren't from the US, and Shannon and Lani's sisters were there, we ended up speaking a lot of Spanish. 

Then on Monday I started rugby. My team practices about ten minutes away from where I live, and... it is a men's team. The women that practice with them don't have their own team, so they just join for practices. It is full tackle, even though the men don't tackle as hard as the women do on other women. I thought the co-ed thing would freak me out, and the fact that almost everyone is above the age of 25. It is so fun, and of course I have only been to one practice, but I know I'll love my team. At one point I heard "does anyone speak english? Can anyone explain the drill?", and I replied "I know rugby." The conjugation was probably horrible, and I sounded like a fool, but for the first time in three weeks I could say something confidently. Living in a different country, while living with a new family, making new friends, and speaking a new language is difficult, and 99% of the time you are unsure of yourself. It was great to say that for two hours I knew what I was doing. 

This week I also found out that my youngest sister, Mattie, had a serious concussion in a soccer game and is now suffering from amnesia. She can't remember friends, family, school, and other major aspects of her life. Getting news like that, while being four thousand miles away, makes you want to just jump on a plane and go home. Not because I want to be home, but because I want to be with my sister. I want to be there for her, and at a time when she needs me most. My parents are showing her pictures, and taking her around my city during the day to see what she can put together. It has been about five days, and slowly but surely she is improving. That's all I can hope for from here! 

Like I said, things get better and then worse, and then the best they've ever been. It is a constant uproar of emotions, and it's hard. Though when someone asks me what my greatest dream is, my answer will always be the same. I am so lucky to be living mine.